The Fight For You Is All I've Ever Known.

I don't know what to do...out of nowhere, things started going really well with me & Isaac. I got my hopes up (AGAIN!) & started feeling like maybe we have a chance...& now there's some chick all over his facebook. I dunno how he feels about her, but she clearly likes him. I hate that I have competition, & I'm not even there to defend myself...I don't even have a chance it feels like. I know everything will work out how it's supposed to, blah blah blah, but I hate the NOT KNOWING. It hurts to see somebody else all over MY boyfriend, & then having to just deal with it because he's not mine at all anymore. It just makes me feel sick, & it's really discouraging because I start to feel like no matter how bad I want this it's never going to work out. Isaac is really good-looking, & really funny...& really single. Of course girls are going to like him. I used to kind of like it, because it was flattering, in a way, knowing he was mine. And now I don't know anything at all & it's just scary because I wonder how long it will be before he chooses one of them over me. I'm not even there to have a chance, & why wouldn't he pick someone who lives closer? Someone he gets to see every day? I mean, I love him, so I want him to be happy...but I don't want him to be happy without me. That's so selfish, but I just hate not knowing what's happening. Sometimes I just want to go back right now. It feels like it's the only way I'll even have a chance of competing with all these other girls that get to see him every day. It hurts so much to see them getting the one thing I want.